Throwback Thursday

Throwing it back today to two of the happiest days of any mom's life!

Blessed!

Tyler accepted Christ as his Lord and Savior on March 30, 2014.

Harley made her profession of faith on November 23, 2014.

I'm Back in the Game!

I've been thinking a lot about previous blog entries that I've made and I remembered how blogging is a great outlet for me.  I'm thinking it may be time to jump back in.

And, at this particular point in my life, I cannot think of a better time.

My life has changed drastically in the past month.  After being challenged by some colleagues at work, I jumped in head-first into a lifestyle I had no idea I would soon embrace so wholeheartedly.

I am now a 21-Day Fix junkie.

Yes, I confess.  I bought into it.  Hook.  Line.  And sinker.

But there is a reason.

After 33 days, I am down 11 pounds and 9 total inches.  I feel awesome.  I am gaining strength I had long forgotten I had.  I'm doing little things like going down steps unassisted and bending straight over to touch my toes again.  I can SEE my toes again!  And it feels wonderful.

Thankfully, my awesome hubby has fully embraced the program as well, seeing as he does all of the cooking in our house.  He has really taken on the challenge of keeping the kids happy and making sure I stay in line with my program.  

And, as unusual as it may sound, my kids have also totally embraced it.  God is just so good.  It is so hard to be healthy in today's society.  Big Macs and Super-size fries are the norm, not the special occasion.  Salads are frowned upon unless they have gobs of Ranch dressing oozing from the side.  

But, I digress.  

Am I perfect.  Heck no!  

Have I cheated?  Yes.  (and you are allowed one cheat meal a week)

Want to know more?  You are in luck!  I have also agreed to become a BeachBody Coach.  You can come see me as soon as my "online office" goes online.  I will check back in tomorrow with that information.

Just taking God at his word:

Yeah, it feels good to be behind the dashboard again.  Really good.

I'm LOVIN' Bloglovin'!!

Apparently Google Reader has decided to bite the dust.

Google Reader was the format that was used most to view and read blogs.

BUT. . .

If you haven't tried Bloglovin', you are missing out!!

You sign up to follow your favorite blogs (I hope one of them is mine lol), and each day you receive an email with a listing of any blogs that have added updates.  It's crisp, clean, and easy to navigate.

It's super easy!  Just go to www.bloglovin.com to get your account and start browsing blogs.  WARNING:  Blog hopping is addictive, but it is oh, so fun!!  :)

To follow me on Bloglovin, simply click on my new widget at the top of my post that says "Follow on Bloglovin."  Easy peasy.

Have a happy Wednesday!!

Still Depressed. . .But Loving Life!!

So, if you follow my blog posts at all, you will recognize the title pretty quickly.  

As you recall, God led me on a divine appointment with my family doctor, who quickly saw straight through me and informed me that I was suffering from depression.

(I have no idea what made her think that--I guess she's not used to blubbering idiots showing up in her office.  lol)



Okay, so maybe I didn't look THAT bad, but it was pretty close!!

Anyway, with my prescriptions in tow, I set out to make some changes in my life.

Am I still depressed??

You bet.

And I'm going to go out on a limb and say I probably always will be.

But, as long as God gives us chemists to keep my brain functioning properly, I can actually function as a real person.

Here's the update:

Yes, my children are being well fed and bathed!  (Maybe not always wonderful home-cooked meals--if you really know me, you'll understand that--but it's ME feeding them, not their dad!!)

As a matter of fact, I went to the Vacation Bible School family night without complaining and actually STAYED UNTIL DARK without complaining!!  OMGosh, that is HUGE for me!!!  (Don't tell the folks I go to church with--I usually hide stuff like that pretty well)

I took the kids to the "Crackle Bear" for breakfast (Harley's request) by myself (and enjoyed it!!)

We've been hitting the pool often!  I've actually discovered that I can "jog" in the water quite easily.  So, the exercise has helped, too!


I've given up my Diet sodas, my "diet" anythings, and anything that contains any trace of aspartame.  (That was huge and I can tell a big difference in the way I feel!)  I now water my regular sodas down or go for tea--half and half.

And, I've lost 19 pounds to date.

I feel wonderful.  I still get tired.  I still get cranky.

But at least I feel NORMAL.

And I'm loving it!!!

Hi, my name is Lynn Mull and I suffer from Depression.  But I do NOT suffer BECAUSE of it!!

All the Praise be to God!!

And Then There Was One

Am I the only person in the world who HATES funerals?  I mean absolutely DETESTS them???

Especially when it comes to extended family.

And more specifically, my MOM's extended family.

It just brings back wayyyy too many memories.

My Aunt Mae passed away this week.



She was such a neat lady.  I used to hang out at her house and play Legos, walk around the cow pastures to the creek, and EAT.

My favorites were her creamed corn and her homemade dill pickles.  Yumm-O!!!

She was like my mom's very best friend.  They would spend HOURS on the phone with her almost daily (and they lived less than 10 miles apart--just go see her for crying out loud!!)

Aunt Mae is on the left.  "Cottontop" was my mom :)

She's had Alzheimer's disease for nearly 8 years now, and for about 7 of those years, she didn't even know anyone in the family.  Her mom (my grandmother) went through the exact same ordeal, but she lay in a nursing home not knowing anyone or anything for 17 years.  Such a cruel disease and such a horrible way to live.

The neat thing about Aunt Mae, though, is that several years before she got sick (I was actually expecting Tyler, so about 11 years ago), I got a phone call telling me that I had to go to Warlick's church that night for their Sunday service.  

Apparently, Aunt Mae had decided that morning that she just needed to be ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN that things were right with the Lord, and she was being baptized that night.  What a blessing that was to watch.

She was the last sister in Mom's family to pass on.  There is only the  one baby brother left.  

It can be so frustrating to a not-even-40-year-old that all of my family is gone.  Poof.  Just like that.

I guess that is a definite downside to waiting until you are older to have children.  (I came along when my mom was 40.)  So many of the memories that my brother & sister, aunts & uncles, cousins, etc. have to carry with them, I have no knowledge of.

I still remember some things, though.  Especially the late night homemade ice cream sessions at Grandma Arney's house.  And playing baseball in the front yard.  And trying to convince the cousins to let me play with them (I was younger by a good ten years, so that  didn't go over so well.) and when they agreed, all they did was play hide-n-seek in the dark and scare the daylights out of me!

I try hard not to live with regrets.  I have to ask for God's mercy in that area many, many times.

But it just kills me that my kids aunt and uncle could be their grandparents, and there are only 2 grandmothers (on Randy's side) for them to know.

While I sat at Aunt Mae's funeral, it was like living my mom's all over again.  So I sit there, tears streaming, and blubbering like an idiot, with Tyler looking at me like I just walked off of Star Trek.

He doesn't remember Aunt Mae.  I guess the last time she saw him, he was only about 3 years old.  (I didn't want him to remember her in the state she was in at the nursing home.)  So I guess he was wondering who this person was and why suddenly she meant so much to me.

Just one more reminder to make the most of every day and to tell those you love over and over how much they mean to you.  

Enjoy Heaven, Aunt Mae. . .I will be there to see you soon!

And, just like that, then there was one. . .

The Hangover

If ever I needed just ONE MORE reason to convince my kids NOT to do drugs, I found it this weekend!!

Talk about a H.A.N.G.O.V.E.R.!!!!!

Boy, did I have one.

Guess I'd better back up (I get ahead of myself a LOT on here).

Since my last post, I have held my head high and proudly not quite so reluctantly chosen to take my prescribed meds the way they are supposed to be taken.  They are also supposed to help me lose weight, a wonderful side effect, in my humble opinion.

While starting my meds, I was also introduced to the greatest fat sucker since leeches!!

(go to http://jamiesisk.myitworks.com for more details)

Anyway, after doing my first detox wrap, I was instructed that I could not have ANY aspartame for 48 hours. . .you ARE joking, right????

So, after much discussion with my hubby. . .and a little bit of internet research, I decided it was time. . .

No more diet sodas. . .no more Crystal Light. . .even my sweet tea is now mixed with 1/2 water.

I was feeling soooooo good about myself!

Until the headache hit.

Oh. My.  Goodness.

The headache.
The head ACHE.

Of a lifetime.

THREE days of feeling like I'd been completely hit by a bus!!!!  And THIS is what that junk has been doing to my system????



So anyway, I have now been artificial sweetener (and mostly) caffeine free for four days now.

And, my meds are kicking in.

Today is looking good!!

(Did I mention I've lost 7 pounds and approx. 10 inches from the wraps???)

Life.  Is.  Good.


Prayers are appreciated!!  :)

A Divine Appointment

As I thought today about how much I was willing to share in this post, I spent some time browsing through my past few posts.  

You guys probably saw the signs before I did.

I guess I should start at the beginning.

I've had this crummy cough for W.E.E.K.S. now.  No congestion.  No snot.  Just a cough.

So I decided yesterday it was time to just bite the bullet and head to the doctor.  (Did I mention that I hate strongly dislike doctors??)

Anyway, I had a terrible time trying to get an appointment, as my doctor left town and I am not "established" anywhere.  I finally got in with the assistant who worked with my previous doctor and thought that would be good enough for now. . .I'd find a new doctor later.

The staff was very friendly!  (The staff with the dr. I wanted to see were kind of stand-offish and smart.)

She walked into the room and. . .

. . .I.  Lost.  It.

Literally.

Bawled like a baby.

And had no choice but to face reality.

I told her about my cough.  And the low-grade fevers.  And the exhaustion--oh, the exhaustion.

The mood swings.  The exhaustion (oh, yes, that bears mentioning twice).

I wake up more exhausted than I was when I go to sleep.  I go to work, do what I have to do when I have to do it, drive home, and PRAY that I can make it from the van to the recliner.

Then I wait until bedtime, go to bed, and do it all over again.

In a nutshell, I do not care.

About anything.

Randy.  My kids.  My job.  Church.  Food. . .nothing.

I hit rock bottom.

I told Randy that both he and my kids would be better off without me in the way and that I was moving out.

Fortunately, it was Mother's Day and my family kind of treated me extra-special and talked me out of that before the kids knew what I was thinking.

Anyhow, the dr. spent LOTS of time talking to me.  I explained that I had been on anti-depressants since H. was born, but took myself off of them because I did not like being dependent on a drug.  

Her rationale was exactly what I needed.

I'm not crazy.

I'm not mental.

(for those of you who truly know me, stop laughing and stay with me here)

I have a chemical imbalance.

Just like someone with diabetes.  Or high blood pressure.  Things in my body, for whatever reason, aren't producing chemicals the way they used to.

I can live with that.

I suffer from a condition called Depression.

It is a real disease, and it has real side effects.  

It is crippling.  To the point I could care less if my kids have supper or get a bath before going to bed.

I left her office feeling better than I have in over a year.  

On my way to have my blood drawn for routine tests, in another part of the office, I began to wince again.

(Have I mentioned I faint with needles?)

Would you believe I didn't even know the girl had poked me?????  I was STUNNED.

But here's the best part.

I look up to get my paper for the front desk, and you will not believe what I saw. . .

A Bible.

God's holy word, with worn pages and what appeared to be years of use.

I knew, absolutely knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that I was meant to be in that office with that doctor for such a time as this.

You want to know what I did tonight?  I bought pizza for the kids for dinner (yes, I slacked just one more time) and then I took BOTH kids to Wal-Mart.  I wouldn't have even considered doing that for the past several weeks.

Am I cured?

Nah.

Probably never will be.

But admitting the problem is half the battle.

And knowing that I am NOT mental and that there IS help out there should I choose to accept it gives me hope.

But more than anything, there is NO doubt that God has had His divine hand on me the entire way. . .even when I deserted Him, He refused to forsake me.

God is good.